I wrote a long and kind of funny (wait, I mean TOTALLY PANTS-WETTINGLY GENIUS) post that refers to a specific video online, and now that video's host has pulled the plug because, I am guessing, too many people watched it. Stupid ISPs or whatever they are.

I just want you readers to know that I am Thinking Of You.

Everything seems to be taking SO LONG lately that suddenly it's the end of the day and I've only finished half of what I planned to do. Plus it's autumn, which puts me (and everyone) in a productive mood; it's the back-to-school schedule that was imprinted upon our minds at an early age. It makes me want to do new things and learn and make stuff. (More on Craftytown today about that.)

Went to the Elliott Smith tribute show last night at the 11s. It was incredibly packed, not just with musicians but with college students and older folks from all over. The music was great; it's the closest I'll ever get to seeing Elliott play. It was an early show and I missed about an hour of it, but I got to hear many of my favorite songs. The crowd was mostly reverent, enthusiastic, and focused, except for a few times when people decided to just keep talking loudly over the performer.

The Bunwinkies played last, to my knowledge. I'm not sure I totally get what they're about. I heard them play two songs but I didn't recognize either of them. Were the songs really obscure Elliott Smith songs, or Bunwinkie originals? I overheard someone in the crowd say "I guess this is supposed to be avant-garde...?" Word. (Not that there's anything wrong with that.) I like all those folks in the band, so I do not mean to diss them. I am just uninformed.

Also, a friend and I went to the Dakin animal shelter and played with some cats and kittens on Saturday (my sister: "So that's what you guys have to do for fun up there?"). It was quite nice. We evaluated each cat and narrowed down the choices to the best two or three. But I am not going to adopt a new cat until my current one stops costing me about 100 bucks per week in vet bills. Right now she is getting goo stuck in her eyelid twice a day (which she HATES), a steroid pill forced down her throat every morning (almost as bad as the eye goo-application), and her thyroid meds mixed into her breakfast. And I am still waiting to hear from the x-ray consultants at Cornell or wherever about her weird spot on her lung. Sigh. She is lucky she's such a beautiful and sweet animal.

I earned another gold star today. A big fucking one. I've earned so many gold stars for good behavior that my little book is almost totally filled. Maybe once it's complete I'll stop judging and second-guessing myself all the time. Most likely I'll just add the book to the pile and begin work on filling up another one. I forgive other people a million times before I'll forgive myself or forget a flaw for even an hour.

I should have a little medic-alert bracelet that says "Caution: Wearer is extremely tender-hearted. She may appear retarded or aloof; please treat with kindness."

Just a quickie to point you all to my homegirl (well, college homegirl) Avani's blog: Places I Go. She is in the middle of an intense business school experience, and she is rad as hell. Go read!

I am sorry I have not posted. See, I have to write something for work, and I keep waiting for the "muse" to "hit me over the head with something heavy" so that I can get down to business, but it has not happened. Also I was in NYC for a meeting yesterday. We drove. It was rainy and trafficky. I actually had to take Bonine on the way home. Ugh. But we did get to eat ultra-hip lunch at the ultra-hip W hotel, which is sort of ultra-hip circa 2000, if that makes any sense. They play techno-dance music in the elevators, for god's sake. I had grilled shrimp on baby greens; I think some aspect of it was "lime-infused." Like many things on the menu, it was totally carb-free (because all super-hip people are on deprivation diets), which is just not enough food for me. So I got some crazy couscous thing on the side. Also on the menu: a breadless BLT. My no-nonsense co-worker ordered it "with bread." Because really, people at the W. Get over yourselves.

This morning my bedroom passed through a warp coil or a ripple in the space-time continuum or something. I was putting my black velvet shirt away in the closet, and I realized that my black velvet shirt was already in the closet. In other words, I was holding my black velvet shirt outside of the closet, while seeing it hanging inside of the closet. I have only one shirt of this sort. "What," I said aloud, as I pulled out the shirt from the closet, comparing the two side by side. Same shirt. Same exact tag (some weird, cheap brand of which I have no other clothing). One tiny difference: one is size XS, and the other is size S. I had gotten the size S as a hand-me-down from a friend a few months ago. I have no idea where the other one came from. If this isn't due to some tearing of the fabric of the universe, it must mean that my shirt has asexually reproduced, and the new shirt hasn't grown to full size yet. How else could it have happened, since I look in my closet almost every day, and have never noticed the two identical shirts? I don't have so many articles of clothing that a duplicate shirt would not stand out. Is one of you playing a trick on me?

I'm back. The eagle has landed.

So there's this Pixar movie coming out November 5 called The Incredibles. There's already plenty of merchandise for sale, and being interested, I checked it out. The teenage daughter is voiced by Sarah Vowell, and I'm a fan of hers. However, the merchandise was depressingly one-sided. As it always is.

Here's what they had:

Small plush dolls of:
Mr. Incredible
Flash (the son)
Syndrome (the [male] villain)
Frozone (Mr. I's buddy)

There are also big talking versions of Mr. Incredible and a babbling baby Jack-Jack. (There's also an interactive Edna doll which gives out fashion advice. She's voiced by Brad Bird.) They also had 5-inch action figures, but guess what - the only Elastigirl and Violet figures came packaged with Jack-Jack and Flash, respectively. The only way I could have bought a Violet is by getting her as part of a set. There are two women in the five-member Incredibles family but they are nowhere to be seen on store shelves. Fuck you, you marketing bastards, for deciding that this is a movie "targeted" for boys, and for assuming that boys don't want to play with female characters, even female characters that have awesome superpowers (Elastigirl as a toy is a no-brainer; make her be a Stretch Armstrong-type thing). Keep on perpetuating the stereotype of men=action and women=all about doing nothing but looking pretty, even when the movie itself has the opposite message. Fuck. You. Seriously.

I'm gonna be away from the officecomputer for a few days as I'm going away on business. I'll be back Thursday, but in the meantime, perhaps you'd like to revisit some past posts in the archives, or try one of the pre-approved blogs linked at right?

I got a nice piece of spam today. Very poetic!:

For example, buzzard defined by ribbon indicates that power drill inside necromancer write a love letter to insurance agent around ball bearing.
When about cashier is niggardly, cloud formation of give secret financial aid to spider behind.
Where we can slyly fall in love with our mirror.
Indeed, living with bride bestow great honor upon defined by piroshki.

Dude, if spraying Summer's Eve on my "personal area" makes it glow as brightly as a lighthouse, I'd rather go without it. (Props to Some Girl for the link.)

My twin sister is stopping by the office with her baby tomorrow, on their way to Brooklyn from New Hampshire. I am excited beyond all reason. I get to show my little niece to all of my work-friends, as if to say, "Hey look at what a pretty baby I'd make, if I had, you know, a husband and a more stable living situation! Ha ha! No, really, I'm looking forward to going home tonight to my bachelorette's apartment and my cat. This is just where I wanted to be at 32!"

I kid, I kid. My personal female-role-enforcing demons are fond of poking at me occasionally, but I'm trying to ignore them and just live my life. It's a pretty good one. I will say, though, that non-twins don't really understand the subconscious comparisons that constantly occur between my sister and me. It can be a lot of pressure, even though we've discussed, aloud, the pros and cons of our current, differing lifestyles.

Anyway, who needs a baby anyway? They need constant attention, they drool a lot, and they stink sometimes. Stupid babies.

This has already been blogged to death, but in case you haven't seen it: Last night during the debate, while deflecting Edwards' criticism about Halliburton, Cheney invited people to check out the facts at Factcheck.com. Unfortunately for him, he meant to say Factcheck.org. Factcheck.com was an available domain, so within an hour George Soros bought the site and had it redirect people to his website, titled "Why we must not re-elect President Bush." Hee!

Try it out here:

www.factcheck.com

www.factcheck.org (which, by the way, is none too pro-Bush/Cheney either)

Edit: I gots to fact-check myself, it seems. So Soros actually had nothing to do with the redirect. Lifted from elsewhere:
Cheney cited FactCheck.com, a for-profit advertising site based in the Cayman Islands. The company decided to redirect traffic to the Soros site after it became inundated with hits -- about 100 a second after the debate, John Berryhill, a Philadelphia lawyer for FactCheck.com, said Wednesday.

"This was to relieve stress on the service and to express a political point of view," said Berryhill, who spoke with the site's administrators shortly after the debate ended.

They picked Soros not only for his political views, Berryhill said, but because the billionaire could afford the costly deluge of hits the site would receive in the wake of the debate. Plus, the site administrators didn't want to point surfers to a candidate's site that was asking for money.

My cat is now on a special diet (Limited Ingredient, which in this case is cat food made from duck and green peas - and nothing but) so that I can rule out any possible allergies that may be causing her coughing problems. She's also on steroids for her inflamed bronchial passages. Her new diet/meds is having one major side-effect, and that is paint-peelingly-stinky poops. This morning she came into the bathroom and laid down some pipe in the litterbox as I brushed my teeth, and the stench was so horrible I could almost see it. And even now that I'm at work, it's like my nose has Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, because I keep thinking I can still smell it, even though that's totally impossible, unless some stray scent molecules managed to hitch a ride on my clothes. Lord have mercy.

Read Fafblog's post-debate pre-debate. It's exactly how I think this debate shit is going to go. I think Krugman is right; it doesn't matter how well Kerry does tonight, the Republican-run media will convince everyone Bush did better.

Rain, rain, kiss my ass. Seriously. One of the few benefits of living up here is that don't have to deal with hurricanes, so Jeanne should take her worn-out rain someplace else. Bitch better step off right now.

Hi. So yeah. I've been busy at work. It's what we call "crunch time" here at the office, because calling it "gritting your teeth, tearing your hair, and mainlining candy to keep up the frenetic pace" is kind of a downer. However, we are getting free lunch tomorrow.

Tonight is the first of three presidential debates. Since I physically can't stand watching or listening to our nation's current leader, I had plans to watch The Daily Show's live coverage at 11 tonight, but it turns out the nice rock show I am planning to go and see starts at 10. So something has got to give. Probably the TV/politics. The rock show is yet another of the excellent valley showcases held at the Iron Horse, and tonight it's Peel, Spouse, and Spanish for Hitchhiking. I don't know the order. It's only 5 bucks, and I can tell you with 100% certainty that at least 2 out of 3 of those bands are awesome. Like making you dance and cry and maybe even both at the same time kind of awesome.

I suppose I should do an update on the ear thing. The nasal spray stuff seems to have worked, because I felt better a day or two after I began using it. Plus stuff started draining, so I think (I hope) that my ear problem was just sinus related. Knock on wood. I can still feel the tiniest difference in my hearing in my right ear, but it's almost back to normal. I am also sleeping with two pillows beneath my head because I read somewhere that you should to that if you're having vertigo issues, but my neck and shoulders hate it and I may return to a uni-pillow situation tonight. Thank you for your concern, my peeps!

The School for the Dead CD release show Saturday night was da bomb. I love seeing bands at PACE because everyone is quiet and paying attention and you can really hear the music. It was hard to not get up and dance, though. And I missed out on the activity pages, which were confined to the cafe area before the show began. Other than that I have no complaints. I loved the opening act, which was comprised of 13 musicians playing one song each, with the musicians playing in random order (names were literally picked out of a bucket; stressful for the musicians, superfun for the audience). Our little valley is filled with amazing talent and just plain good people. Our rockstars are not ego-trippin' assholes, is what I am saying.

SFTD played wonderfully as always. It's hard to come up with new things to say about them, because they're always great. Um, there were a couple of new song transitions. I dig that shit. I haven't listened to the new CD but I am enjoying the drawings (by henning!) throughout the CD booklet. Go get yourself a copy. The New You, it is called.

P.S. Scotty B also has a good take on the show, complete with many links.

So, this morning I went to the walk-in, no-appointment-neccessary time at my doctor's office, where a nurse practitioner declared my problem not an infection but most likely just allergies or a virus. She was pretty sure that my estrucian tube or whatever was clogged and not draining properly, because my ear was fuller of fluid than it should be. However, there was nothing she could do about it. She said to take Sudafed (I have been, doesn't seem to work) and I asked her if I could try an antihistamine nasal spray and she said sure and gave me a free sample. (I used it, it was okay.) I just have to ride this crap out. I said I was worried I had Meniere's Disease and she said, "you don't have it right now ... will it turn into Meniere's? I don't know." Great.

It will probably just slowly clear up and no permanent harm will be done. I hope.

I'm freaking out a little. I think I have Meniere's Disease. It's an inner ear disorder, I guess. It's marked by a feeling of fullness in the ear, a loud low buzzing (like tinnitus) with hearing loss, and dizziness/vertigo. And there's no cure, per se, though there are things that can calm it. I have been getting episodes of this about once a year (or less) ever since I used a hand-held metal grinder with no ear protection in college, because Mt. Holyoke had none. I should have sued those fuckers. I was deaf with tinnitus in my right ear for a week, though it slowly improved. I think that was the triggering event that created this disorder.

I've never barfed from the dizziness, and in fact it's usually been the kind of almost-pleasant floaty sensation one gets when one is battling a high fever. But the past two days have been pretty crappy. My hearing is almost back to normal but I've been feeling more nauseous. Not good. I hate rushing to the doctor just because my ear "feels funny" (see: an awesome Roz Chast cartoon about hypochondriacs) but this seems like a real and definable thing.

Okay. Here are an unprecedented TEN photos this time, of the Franklin County Fair last weekend. And yes, I know the Big E starts this weekend.

There was an entire building filled with prize-winning vegetables and flowers and baked goods (and many runners-up). This carrot won for Longest Carrot! And I got to see it with my own eyes!




As I mentioned there was a Baby Animal Barn. And so here is a genuine pig pile:




This poor lamb is suckling on a metal bolt! Don't feel too bad, his mom is just out of frame. This lamb is just stupid.




And there were also baby goats. Very cute. I like this photo a lot.




But not all of the animals got to just laze around! These little pigs are pro RACERS! And man, could these little guys move. They ran and dove and swam super fast. All to get a couple of cookies.




And then it was time to walk around the midway! The rides are fairly safe, but only if you always listen to Mr. Safety!




It looks so sane and calm when it's like this, in broad daylight, not groaning and creaking and whirling.




This one was pretty.




Here's a shot of the underside of a ride that resembles a giant roulette wheel. It turns and twirls around and up and down like a spun quarter.




You could also put little girls on a couple of bungee cords and send them into the air.




And that was my day at the fair!