I took my cat to the vet today. Turns out my old cat just has a fever, which is why she's not eating. Of course, they put a can of special AX (short for Anorexia; for those self-conscious cats who were sexually molested as kittens and now have self esteem issues) cat food in front of her and she gobbled it up hungrily. They also did a blood test, and she does NOT have leukemia, or kitty AIDS. Aw yeah, I always knew my cat did the safe bangin'.