[warning: major bitchery ahead.]

I guess spring really is coming, despite the freezing-cold nipple-shattering wind chill, because I keep getting harassed by various panhandlers/people wanting my money. There are these guys who lay in wait off to the side of the sidewalk on Main Street; depending on where the sun is, they're either in front of Faces or Thornes. They have three-ring binders, and always start a conversation with you as you approach, by complimenting you or blurting out something about the weather, and once you answer it means they've made contact and they swoop in, wanting to take just a few minutes of your time to explain why they need your money. I do not begrudge them their right to do so, and I think that (unlike the actual panhandlers) it's probably good to give them money. But I work and live here, man. I can't stop every frickin' day to talk to them, and I can't give money every day, in fact I really shouldn't give much of anything at all, and 99% of the time I can't spend the time it would take to give them the money, since I'm either on my way to work (today was the first time I've been waylaid on a weekday morning - it was about 9:15 a.m.) or on my way to grab lunch and get back to the office, or I'm on my way home. Yesterday during lunch there were two 3-ring binder guys and thirty feet away were two MassPIRG girls. Both pairs asked me to stop and listen and I had to be an asshole and say no thanks, doing the cold New York City no-eye-contact glare-at-the-sidewalk as I hurried past, my body language saying 'can't you see I'm walkin' here?' I'm not a tourist, I'm not wealthy, I don't own property here, I'm not in town to shop, I'm just living here, pretending Northampton is a town where people actually live and work and not just a quaint historic shopping center.

I hate saying no to the binder guys, though. It makes me feel like an asshole. It's way easier for me to turn down actual panhandlers, since I have a very strong feeling that they are, in the vast majority of the time, going to spend the money on Bad Things. I actually once saw this in action, when I accidentally came upon Annoying, Loud, Bad-Guitar-Playing Guy getting high with a couple of buddies on the old canal tow-path (the one from the Roundhouse lot to the Felt building). (This is the same path where a dog walker found a dead homeless guy a few months ago...)

I guess I'm just kind of a bitch. I'm a Quaker, so I should be all generous and giving, but instead I act like a cornered wolverine, snarling and snapping and hoarding my tiny stash of acorns. People, don't be like me. Live Simply, So Others May Simply Live.